Over on my Instagram account, I frequently share “Professional Toddler Tips” from my little one on my stories. Since they disappear after a day, I wanted to compile the best of my toddler’s skills. I’m pretty sure most parents of toddlers can relate to these!
Toddlers are notorious for tantrums, defiance, and mess-making. But some kids take it to the next level with their skill and determination. Here are a few signs you might have a professional toddler in your care.
And if you don’t have a professional toddler yet, my daughter is here to offer some free tips.
Professional Toddler
Hi! I’m Whitney and I’m a “Professional Toddler”. I’m here to teach toddlers who want to take it to the next level and achieve all their tiny tot dreams. You can make this happen. I have complete confidence in you moving from an amateur toddler to a professional! Just follow this list of 10 simple behaviors!
Drop your shoulders
Mastering this skill is of the utmost importance. When mom or dad try to pick you up to stop you from running bat-crazy into the parking lot, slacken your shoulder and then they can’t pick you up! This is the only way to assert your will!
2. Learn to run the same day you learn to walk
While walking is fine, running is preferred, especially if it is away from mom and dad!
3. Throw a Tantrum. Especially if mom or dad is trying to keep you safe and protected.
4. Your agenda should never align with mom and dad’s agenda!
When you attend a museum just for kids, climb the stairs over and over and over.
And refer to #3 when mom drags you away from the stairs and to the kids play area.
5. Have you ever hidden from mom in your own house? That’s a professional!
Once mom is in full panic mode, running from room to room, calling your name (of course, don’t answer her). She will eventually find you playing behind the couch and she will give you all the attention, love and food you want.
6. Simultaneously creating a mess with food and through the diaper takes huge skill.
7. Messes, Messes, Messes.
If we didn’t cover this enough in #6, I want to be clear that you should be creating more messes than adults can clean up in one nap time. And just to make sure they know what a professional toddler you are, while they clean, go make a mess somewhere else. 
8. Sleep positions
Refuse to fall asleep anywhere while on the go. But once at home in your crib, feel free to try to least comfortable positions possible.
9. If it’s dangerous, do it!
Table walking. Chair climbing. Running into the street. Playing with outlets. These behaviors really help a toddler succeed in their job. 
10. Explore and Discover everything in your environment.
Open every cupboard. Climb on every chair. Up and over baby gates.
Make sure to return to things that are potentially dangerous or dirty over and over and over.
Do you have a professional toddler? Aren’t you so proud of your little one mastering these skills so early in life?
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1 Comment
I hope my toddler is not trading this post!
Great posts..you had just the right pics for the list! XOXO